Huh? Part Five: Primobolan

So rather than speculate how dirty the MLBPA is/may be, let's take a look at what A-Rod has reportedly tested positive for using testosterone and primobolan. If you were to look at me, you would know that I rarely spend time in the gym and I got a C in 10th grade chemistry, so I obviously wouldn't know what to do with a steroid. For me, a performance enhancing drug is one of those Cadbury's Cream Eggs.

So let's take a look at it, because what I noticed being thrown around following the story yesterday was the guys on television expressing shock and disbelief because A-Rod doesn't look like Popeye or Mark McGwire. I'm guessing this is attributed to the type of steroid he reportedly used.

From Bodybuilding: Primobolan is a well-known and popular steroid as well. Like nandrolone it's most often used as a base compound for stacking with other steroids....Because it is a widely available steroid its often used as a replacement for nandrolone or boldenone to those who have no access to Deca-Durabolin or Laurabolin or Equipoise.

Maybe you remember Deca-Durabolin if you have read "Juicing the Game" by Howard Bryant (excellent book) or "Game of Shadows." Or if you're Rafael Palmeiro.

Then regard this (still from the linked Bodybuilding article): For athletes who wish to maintain a "natural" status in competition, the tablets are quite well-suited as detection chances for the acetate-form are quite slim. However tests have improved and quite a number of metabolites1 of methenolone can be detected with a simple urine sample. But an English study documented that there is a liability in eating methenolone contaminated meats2, which could provide a possible defense if found out. One could always claim they ate the meat of a chicken or cow injected with methenolone since the test concluded eating such meat does not improve performance, but can deliver positive tests for several methenolone metabolites almost 24 hours after ingestion. That's for those of you seeking a viable defense against a possible methenolone-positive.

Of course, the reported presence of testosterone in A-Rod's tests would kind of blow that "I ate a juiced-up hamburger defense," but it'll be interesting to see what A-Rod says.

George Spellwin's Elite Fitness, says this in December 2004: "Primobolan - The Ultimate Steroid? I Think Yes!" Primobolan Depot is an extremely effective steroid that's earned its respect as the safest injectable steroid. It's the only steroid that will yield solid gains even on a low calorie diet. It's also the only steroid that will build solid muscle slowly with minimal to no side effects... No acne, no aggression, no water bloat, no loss of sex drive, and its the only steroid that will not shut down HPTA (you want to have kids one day right?). I honestly cant think of another steroid that compares to primobolan!

All of this is important, especially if you're trying to hook Madonna away from Guy Ritchie. If you didn't know, now you know. For other Huh? articles, click the label to your right.